We spend too much time wondering what might have been. We spend too much time wondering what our exes (not just romantic) are doing with their lives. We envy others for their successes, and don’t know about their failures. A corollary to the Epictetus advice that we can only control our own actions, and not to worry about what others say or do, is the advice to forget about what our past connections are doing with their current lives. Every moment we waste wondering about the other is a moment not lived to the fullest. Look inward. Look at the life you control. Look at what you are doing with your own life.
“Do not waste the remainder of your life in thoughts about others, when you do not require these thoughts. For you lose the opportunity of doing something else when you have such thoughts as these, what is such a person doing, and why, and what is he saying, and what is he thinking of, and what is he contriving, and whatever else of the kind makes us wander away from the observation of our own ruling power”.